EPIC MOVIES!


Have you ever seen these LONG, LONG, LONG movies on network TV around the holidays?

Pay close attention to what's playing on Easter, Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year's.....and you'll definitely find some Three Hour Long Bible Epic Films playing.

Danny Loves Bible Epic Films.

I don't really watch these movies for religious reasons but for the pure grandness and spectacle.

Movie Studios just don't make movies like these anymore....Too Expensive!

Movie studios today would be Very Reluctant to sign off on a Huge movie like Ben-Hur and The Ten Commandments.

Watch BEN-HUR and THE TEN COMMANDMENTS — both starring Charlton Heston — and you'll see what I mean.

And when you watch this Old Biblical Epic Movies, you'll realize that.....

"Epic Movies Are Very Expensive"

All the people are real. All the costumes are real. All the horses are real. The set designs must have cost a fortune.

So, at the time, the costs of making these movies were through the roof!

As a matter of fact, the movie studio who financed Ben-Hur was on the verge of bankruptcy. Ben-Hur was their Make-or-Break picture.

Talk about pressure, man!

I've had a lot of pressure situations come up at my past jobs.....but I've never had the fate of entire movie studio hang on the financial success of my work.

The reason why movie studios were backing these huge, expensive epic movies was because of Television.

The movie studios back then were nervous that the newly popular TV would steal their business.

So they got together and ask themselves.....

"What can theatrical movies do that TV shows can't do?"

Answer: The Epic Movies!

When it comes to Big Budget Hollywood Epic Movies....Television just cannot compete.

That's exactly what happened with Cleopatra in 1963.

Originally budgeted at $2 Million....it ended up costing $44 Million — over $300 Million by today's standards!

Cleopatra went over budget by over Two Thousand Percent....DAMN!

Check it out at Wikipedia! (new window)

"The Chariot Race From Ben-Hur"

I've sat through Ben-Hur, from beginning to end, only a couple of times...but I NEVER EVER miss the Chariot Race!

It is the most exciting action sequence ever put together. It comes at the perfect time in the story.

Ben-Hur is close to Four Hours Long! That's long even by Epic Movies Standards.

But the Chariot Race is played out at around the Two and a Half hour point in the movie. So there was no falling asleep while watching Ben-Hur.

And back in the 1950's, there were no such thing as 20-movie multiplexes.

So a movie like Ben-Hur would be shown on a single screen the size of 5-story building!

Some of you might be wondering,

"How could people stay seated for 4 hours straight watching these epic movies?"

Well, they use to have intermissions to let the audience get up and stretch their legs.

One of the biggest complaints about Epic Movies today is that the theaters don't have intermissions anymore.

So you're forced to sit there for the entire 3+ Hours!

TITANIC:

"The Most Profitable Chick Flick
Of All Time"

That feat has been repeated only twice since then.....by other epic movies.


• Titanic (1997)


• The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (2003)


Titanic was totally amazing to me at the time.

I'm a little embarrassed to admit this..... but it was the Love Story in Titanic that kept my interest.

The Love Story was the main hook that kept me in my seat for the entire length of the movie.....which was around 200 Minutes!

I know, I know.....I'm a sell-out to Men everywhere. I'll have to turn in my Testosterone Union Card!

Titanic is one Chick Flick that definitely slipped past Danny's Evil Chick Flick Radar Detector!

I've seen plenty of movies that had a Romance sub-plot....but this was the first time I was Hooked on the Romance sub-plot.

Every other time that I had to sit through a Chick Flick, I didn't care about the Romance stuff at all.....I was just eagerly anticipating some Super-HOT Sex Scenes.

The sex scene in Titanic was well-made....but it wasn't HOT!

I did like that little scene when Kate Winslet does her Nude Model imitation.

Actresses don't mind taking it off for the camera if it's Artistic and Tastefully Done.....Whatever!

Whenever I listen to an Actress with a Great Body try to explain how the Nudity was an Artistic Expression of something, I just want to scream.....

"Danny Doesn't Give A Shit
How You Justify It To Yourself!"

Hey! Whatever helps you sleep at night, baby!

Now Shut Up give me my Nude Lap Dance!

It was constantly being delayed. It went way over budget.

Filming in and around water was the main problem....lots of damaged equipment.

And then you had the Actors who turn into little cry babies if things aren't all prefect.

So I think the initial bulk of people who went to see Titanic wanted to see if it was going to be as bad as they were led to believe.

Titanic became the biggest Date Movie of all time! Girls went to see it again and again and again.....and again!

I only saw Titanic once at the theater....but I couldn't wait for the VHS release in 1998.

It wasn't released onto DVD until 1999.

Especially that annoying Cιline Dion song, My Heart Will Go On!

Just thinking of that song again makes me want to stick Icepicks into my Ears and Stab my Brain!

The funniest parody came from the TV show Futurama.

And of course, James Cameron is a master at the technical side of movie making.

The detail that went into the sinking of The Titanic was AWESOME!

As a matter of fact, of the 11 Oscars it won, 9 of them were for technical achievements.

No Oscars For Acting!

The exact same thing happened to The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King!

"Don't Depend on Historical Epic Movies to be Historically Accurate!"

Most Epic Movies are based on historical events..... Historical Epic Movies.

One thing with Historical Epic Movies though.....they are usually NOT Historically Accurate.

Sometimes a lot of Artistic License is used to make the story more exciting.....but the story can't be taken too literally.

Historical Epic Movies must not be confused with Actual History....even when the director insists that it is Historically Accurate.

Which brings me to Oliver Stone.

On my "Why" Page, I made a little crack about the movie JFK.

I consider it an Historical Epic Movie only because the assassination of John F. Kennedy did actually occur in 1963.

But that's one of the few things about JFK that's historically accurate.

Outside of that, all the finer details are a mix between accurate events and the imagination of Oliver Stone.

My opinion is that Oliver Stone believes what he theorizes in JFK....to the point where he manipulates the historical events in his movie to Prove his case.

JFK did raise some interesting questions.... The Magic Bullet Theory, for example.

But he didn't prove his explanations beyond any shadow of a doubt.

The only people that could possibly shed light on the JFK assassination is the government....the same government we're told not to trust in JFK!

Titanic is much more Historically Accurate then JFK.

If I wanted to make a great movie that captures the audiences attention for Three Hours....I would use the techniques that Oliver Stone used in JFK.

For a long time, I took JFK at face value.

Great movies can do that....they can suck you into the Story and get you Emotionally Invested in the Central Characters.

It wasn't until I decided to take the time to look a little deeper that I found MANY PEOPLE disagreeing with Stone's version of History.

People who spent years investigating the case.

People who were actually in Dallas in 1963....as opposed to Oliver Stone who was not.

Oliver Stone himself tried to pass the movie off as MOSTLY Historically Accurate....but he's been proven wrong over and over again.

Some "Facts" are tweaked a little bit.

Some "Facts" are Totally False!

Another Historical Movie that Olive Stone made was Alexander....which has also been accused of many Historical Inaccuracies.

One of my Favorite Epic Movies, Braveheart, is 99% Historically Inaccurate.

Mel Gibson himself admitted this....he never tried to convince his audiences that Braveheart was Historically Accurate.

Braveheart is just a Great Movie with a Great Story and with Great Actors.....it is NOT a History Lesson!

"BOTTOM LINE....."

So historical accuracy is NOT at the top of their TO-DO LIST!


If you want Accurate History....do NOT watch Historical Movies. Instead read History Books or watch Historical Documentaries.


As a matter of fact, I used to watch a show on The History Channel called History vs. Hollywood.

The show would compare Real Historical Events to Hollywood Make Believe Historical Events.

Danny has more to say about Arrogant, Annoying, Asshole Celebrities at The Hollywood Celebrities Page!

"Danny's War Movies Page"

When I saw that the page became too long, I gave War Movies it's own page and it's own Movie Category.

So check out my Classic War Movies Page.

"Even More Info On Epic Movies Can Be Found On
Entertainment Movie Guide"

But, in fact, I enjoy Historical and War Movies very much.....as long as I always remember that these movies are for Entertainment Purposes ONLY!

Check out the Following Pages to find out what other Epic Movies Doctor Danny thinks you should Waste INVEST your time in!

1. History Of Epic Movies
   • This page contains the History and Myths about the Epic Movie Genre.
   
   
   
2. Full-Page Reviews Of Epic Movies
   • This page contains Full-Page Movie Reviews from different Epic Movies.
   
   
   
3. Epic Movies Store — Coming Soon!

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